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The 21st Century Approaches Puberty? [Jan. 1st, 2010|04:06 am]
[Current Location |Samwise]
[mood |exhaustedexhausted]

It's been another year. We're finishing a decade. Nearly all of my friends have stopped posting in Livejournal. Probably no one checks it. And yet, we all still have these. Does user generated content ever die? I am reminded of my favorite ukelelist's (is that a word?)song "MyHope." Look it up.

Anyway. I come back. Like Odyseus, after a long and trying journey. No one here would recognize me. But like that trusty old dog, livejournal can still smell it's me.

Things I've learned this year:

+ I like sex a lot. And there are really truly a great many ways to do sex.

+ I'm not particularly attached to masculinity, at least not in the way I was when I had to prove myself a true transsexual. I'd rather be dyke identified, with my faggy moments.

+ No matter how much you love a child, their parents can hurt them more than you can help them. But that's no reason to stop trying.

+ Ignoring community trauma means you pay for the pain later, in slow, dreadful drips for months and months and maybe years (ask me next year).

+ I'm a happier person when I've something to do (school, work, taking care of children).

+ It's never a good idea to go off your meds at the same time as making other big changes in lifestyle.

This year has been incredibly painful. It was like running a gauntlet, it was like falling down stairs, it was like being a burglar in Home Alone. The audience knows the nail is in the stair, the iron is on the doorknob, but you step, but you grasp anyway. And then the traumatic events stopped, and I was left instead just traumatized, sitting with the sinking, hopeless feeling for the last three months.

Here's to this centuries awkward preteen years. Here's to 'Not 2009.' I made it through this year. It didn't kill me.
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(no subject) [Oct. 25th, 2008|07:19 pm]
Just thought you all should know, the 3rd most popular expansion for Open Office is the Polish Distionary Pack (complete with spell check, thesaurus, and hyphenation rules). This week alone, it had over 12,250 downloads!
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attn wrld [Aug. 7th, 2008|01:47 pm]
Attention World: Elliot's looking for a bicycle. Elliot is on the hunt for a bicycle. Bicycle bicycle bicycle.

you may now go back to your regular programming or whatever it is the world is up to.
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so step off [Jul. 25th, 2008|10:50 pm]
So, the summer this far:
my brother visited first week of summer
then I went to SR and played broomball and wished becca c a happy birthday
then I started teaching at the dojo and stopped taking my pills and went through a miserable withdrawal with nasty physical effects
then I took a train to portland, and that was fun, but I still had withdrawal symptoms and half the people I went to go visit weren't in town. also train seats make you cramp in the oddest ways
then I got back (plus a nasty tonsil infection!) and my sister was in town for a week and a half.
So some SR kids visited for the x-files movies (which sucked. hardcore.), and then my sister left.

Then there is today. The first day of my summer after which there are no plans, no expected visitors. Time to do more things for myself?

Only except for the fact that I'm terrible at doing things for myself, and already I'm hurting like hell.
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Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: An Anarchist Critique [Jul. 19th, 2008|04:30 pm]
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: An Anarchist Critique


Robbing banks. Liberating animals. Storming the statehouse. Abolishing speciesism and racial/Blood Purity as demarcation lines between magical beings. Creating a revoutionary guerilla foco in the forest while mounting a base of support in the population. Joining with other focos to foment a popular revolt in a rebel stronghold that will bring down the government once and for all. But Harry Potter does not strive for wizard liberation, nor the liberation of the “magic” internal colonies. Harry Potter’s Hogwarts revolt does nothing more than to restore state power to those with whom Harry Potter agrees.

“Freed” house elves, wizards, centaurs, and half-giants fight alongside one another in a popular front against the fascist menace, just like in Spain in 1936. But, crucially, in the background of that conflict, social revolution was quietly taking place on top of those very barricades, where classes were abolished, the means of production seized, and prisons converted into dormitories. Harry Potter’s revolution is nothing more than a Republicanist reaction to Voldemort’s Death Eater coup.

Let us study the oppressed in the Magical world: Ron Weasley, with his hand-me-down tattered clothing and his lack of proper preparation for schooling, showed us in earlier books that class and economic oppressions still rear their ugly head in a world where plenty is a flick of a wand away. Obviously, house elves are domestic slaves, forced into their oppression by cruel hexes that cause them to abdicate all power to their Wizard master. Goblins are another internal colony: kept from wand-magic, and used as pawns to oppress the economically exploitated wizards by tending the bank in which the monied wizards leave their treasures.

In fact, the only being conscious of the oppression of the state/proto-capitalist system was the goblin Griphook. Griphook believed (as does the IWW) that labor is entitled to all it creates. Griphook was uninterested in money or in personal gain, but played his part in the Harry Potter narrative to advance the liberation and the restoration of dignity to his people. Griphook is mildly demonized in the book for his beliefs, and after the Hogwarts revolt, it is likely that the situation of his race underneath the “liberator” Harry’s will not change.

We see, 19 years later, all the mechanisms of oppression inherent in the state (the torture chamber prison, the Aurors, the Ministry) still there, unharmed by the Hogwarts revolt that for a short time ousted the government in its entirety. The state’s oppressive nature has not been questioned, only who is able to weild it.

We know that Voldemort’s ascendance to power is not the first failure of “magic” government. Death Eaters had come close to power around the time of Harry’s parents’ death. Outside of the UK, Grindelwald lead his fascist army into an autocratic nightmare that slaughtered thousands “for the greater good.” At any time, another tyrant as bad or worse than Voldemort can once again take control of these reins of oppression and steam-roll the tragic machinery of slavery, torture, and authority over whatever it wants. We, as anarchists, know that all government is the same, labeled magic or Muggle. We need one, two, many Hogwarts, before all magical beings are free.

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It's 4 AM; do you know where your theory of science is? [May. 7th, 2008|04:06 am]
So here's the thing:

Dobzhansky. Theodosius Grygorovych Dobzhansky. Brilliant fucking man. Integral part of the unification of the biological sciences via evolutionary theory.

Behe. Michael J Behe. Complete fucking idiot. Integral part of the Intelligent Design movement based out of Discovery Institute in Seattle WA.

Behe, in arguing for the design of bacterial flagellar rotary motors by a benevolent and intelligent designer, says “though we are told that all biology must be seen through the lens of evolution, no scientist has ever published a model to account for the gradual evolution of this extraordinary molecular machine” (Behe, 72)

Well, that sure looks to me like a reference to one of Theodosius' last publications, an essay entitled "Nothing in Biology Makes Sense Except in Light of Evolution." Topic of that particular article? The incompatibility of creationist logic with biological sciences: “It is a blunder to mistake the Holy Scriptures for elementary textbooks of astronomy, geology, biology, and anthropology.”

Don't you look like a dolt, Michael Behe.

PS: Check out the Discovery Institute's webpage for hints of neoconservative buzzwords and neoliberal policies! It's like neo-imperial Bingo on that site!
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I'm GRADUMALATING! [Apr. 25th, 2008|02:46 pm]

So I finally got my ass in gear and I filled out all the appropriate forms and I got all the appropriate signatures, and went to all the right office hours and drop-in times, and now I'm not only eligible to graduate, I'm graduating with a degree! A degree in something! YAY!

Now all I need to do is register to walk come June....Seeing as my parents are coming to visit for that express purpose.

so, yeah, I'm feeling pretty good.

I'm thinking of doing the rainbow graduation. Hey bio-friends, are you doing the biograduation? Should I walk with you?

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Failure! [Mar. 30th, 2008|12:49 am]
So I checked my grades on Friday afternoon. I got an A in Spanish and...an F in States, War, and Capitalism. What the fuck. I kicked that courses ass. I freaked out.And emailed my TA about it.

He got back to me today. Turns out he didn't realize Elliot Newman and Elizabeth Newman might be the same person. Turns out I got an A. That was a lot of needless stress.

Note to self: go to the courthouse some weekday this week and start filling out paperwork.
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moving on [Feb. 20th, 2008|12:06 pm]
Consequence passed away yesterday morning. I skipped out on one of my tutoring sessions, so she didn't die alone. I'm going to bury her tomorrow evening, probably around 5 or 6 near tree 9 next to circumstance. Give me a call if you want to come along.
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Toast is only a hindrance. [Feb. 17th, 2008|12:55 pm]
I am so goddamn tired of the attitudes people have toward antidepressants. Your punk-ass normal brain chemistry faces blabbing about how people shouldn't take happy pills because it makes them into mindless happy people is ignorant as fuck and keeps people who really do need some kind of chemical readjustment from seeking the help they need. Not saying everyone needs pills, or even that every depressed fuck needs pills. Just saying, your radical liberalism and hippy 'let-nature-fix-you' attitude is ignorant and harmful, so stfu.

That's just me ranting. Don't mind me.

I'm feeling really freaking cool today, if a little awkward. I'm sore from jujutsu and dancing, and that makes me awesome. I feel powerful, in an egalitarian and mutually autonomous way!

I have been feeling nostalgic for a thing that never was: High school, except where I'm like I am now, and all my friends are too. Wouldn't it have been neat to be better adjusted and have wider world views in which we realized that school was way less important, and other kids just dumb fucks? All that time to hang out, and be awesome. Basically what I'm saying is I miss you kids. we need to spend more time together. Whenever we have time. You're all going to disperse and become madly famous and successful. I'll go find your couches to sleep on, and cheer you up when you're bored with being famous and successful. Swenyo, enough ancient text deciphering, let's go to the beach today. Becca, don't you think you've translated enough poetry for the day? Let's go chase pigeons in the park. Sarah, you I'll just abduct, because I know you'll find your life's work wherever. Haircut, five dollar! And Erik, I don't know if you read my page anymore, and I'm not really sure what you want to make your life about, but I'd like to find out, and get to know you again.

And Santa Cruz friends: I'm missing y'all. And that's my own damn fault. My birthday's coming up, and you know how I hate birthdays. We should play boardgames or something. I need to come out of my school/zami imposed isolation. And the best part is: I can! Because I dropped a class! Yay for part time!

Here's to taking care of yourself!
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